I met Mrs. Smith's single son, Bob. And Joe. And Mark. And Herman...

My weekend. Wow. Really, wow.

I love my family! I do!

But seriously? My mother makes me go temporarily insane. She wants to make sure every piece of my life is in order.. and right now, that just isn't possible. She can't seem to get that I can only do the best that I can with what I have.

Plus.

Did you know that your life isn't complete without a significant other? Your life can't have an ounce of happiness without a partner for your life to stoke the happiness fire.


Obviously, this concerns my mother greatly since I am single.

Bummer.

No, really, bummer. It makes my life a little like speed dating every time I go home. She lines them up... and then parade them around.

Well.. the first guy to stop by, K., was a total sweetheart. Read "the shy, creepy guy, who never comes out of his room and has absolutely no social skills". I kind of liked him, but it wouldn't have worked out. He flinched when I went to hug him goodbye.. and you know I like hugs.

Later that day, B. stopped by for dinner. B. and I dated for a few years in high school, so needless to say, my mom made a real good choice bringing a blast from the past. (insert sarcasm here)

Brunch on Sunday was with the Carters. Let me tell you, friends, this was the absolute highlight of my weekend. The Carter son has been out of the closet for years. The Carters, of course, know. Everyone who sees the Carter son knows.....

except my mom.

Dear mom. Trying to set me up with the gay man was probably the most quality moment of my life. Why, you ask?

Besides the obvious entertainment value, I did actually try to explain to Mom that he was gay. Her response??

"Well, I never said S-E-X was important. And he seems really nice, friendly, outgoing. You could do worse."

Yes, Mom, thanks. I can see how I might do worse than tying my life to a man who "has a reputation with the ladies." (By ladies, I mean drag queens. and nope, not kidding)

:sigh:

Where is my prince charming? My single, non-recycled, socially adept, non-gay man....

Have you met Mrs. Smith's single son, Bob?

I've been truly blessed with a loving family. Sometimes it even freaks ME out how very Pleasantville we are.



Don't get me wrong — we have our problems and struggles. But all in all, I look back through my childhood and see love.

My mom is a wonderful, caring, generous woman. She's a truly great listener (a character trait that I believe skips a generation) and is always interested to hear what I have to say.

My dad dotes on me. I'll always be his little girl, and he's the one that told me if I really wanted to be a fairy princess when I grew up, then I should just do my best and see what happens. (Still waiting...)

My brother is the most brother-like guy you could have as a brother. In school, we didn't acknowledge each other.. at home we fought like cats and dogs.. in public, we stood up for each other. Now, we tolerate each other and are calling a kind of truce where we become friends.

So I'm going home this weekend to spend some time with the family. As much as I love them, I already know what's coming. At SOME point, my mom will begin to discuss so-and-so's son, who's single and amazing... yada yada yada.

I think her secret vice is embarrassing me in front of her friend's sons.

Look forward to hearing about my weekend.. and pray for me.

I hear they're hiring at McDonald's.

So I have this minor, itty-bitty problem. I have no idea what I want to do with my life.

Okay, that's a lie. I have no idea how to go about getting the job I desire.

That's much more realistic. Face it, in some businesses.. you have to "know someone" to get the job you want. Good resumes, follow-up calls, dropping things off in person, even sheer audacity with special "remember-me" schemes.. sometimes none of that seems to matter.

I don't think anyone prepares students for the reality of life after college, which is such a shame. After the kudos and slaps on the back from my professors... all of which said I had "such talent", it was a slap in the face to apply for job after job with no real response.

I think that college students would be better served with some kind of pre-graduation seminar on the trials and pitfalls of job hunting. Some kind of idea of how things work. And tips on how to NOT take things personally.

(I'm still open for those tips....)

Otherwise, you end up like me...

A decent job, that isn't close to what I was looking for in the first place.. and no clue how to take the next step.

It's almost Catch-22. They want you to have experience, but aren't willing to give you a position where you can gain that experience.